- Name: Jakub (Kuba) Jezusek
- Height: 5’10”ish
- Weight: I don’t know
- Top 3: 2
Kuba Gooding Jr. joined Bolt as a freshman, directly after saving his biological father from a blizzard in the hit film “Snow Dogs.” He is a sophomore majoring in Computer Science in the McCormick School of Engineering.
A year of developing his skills allowed him to make the jump to NUT as a sophomore, quickly becoming one of the team’s most dynamic defenders. He challenges everything, yet remembers nothing. One of the fastest players on the team, Kuba consistently puts everyone else to shame during conditioning and on the field. He developed this incredible speed by sprinting in and out of Claire’s to obtain earrings. He is an incredibly solid man defender and a nightmare to guard, refusing to be weighed down by the diamond earring in his stomach.
Kuba also possesses an uncanny targeting ability, but has only figured out how to use it on his own teammates. He has used this skill to make quite an impact on NUT, notably applying a permanent imprint on Rozo’s forehead.
Kuba is a future star of the program. Over the summer he aspires to improve the only glaring weakness in his game: knowing how many fingers other people are holding up. Look for him to be shutting down the best players in the region next season.
- Written by: Ben Spielman